5 Ways To Be Happier With Less

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Thrifty living is not for everyone (though everyone could stand to be a little more thrifty!) and it can take some hard work. But scratch cooking, clothes making, plastic baggie washing, and cloth diapering aside, the hardest part of being thrifty can actually be purely mental.

Many of us have ideas in our head of how we are supposed to live - big house, nice car (at least two if you are a  married household), new clothes whenever you feel like it, nice dinners out a couple times a week...and the list goes on and on. I am not saying that any of these things is necessarily a bad thing if you can afford it and that is where your priorities are. But we shouldn't just expect that we should have these things and should instead accept the fact that we can't have everything in life. Just as we are told as kids - life isn't always fair!

No, scratch that last idea. We shouldn't just accept that we can't have something; that implies that we still want it and do not feel that what we have is adequate. Instead we should learn to be truly happy with less and with what we do have. This is a simple task, but again, it can be so difficult! We are almost trained by society today to place so much value on things and stuff. The result is us feeling like we have to have more of this and the latest of that in order to be important and valued as a person. We can sometimes feel like we are going to be looked down on and judged by others if we don't try to impress with our belongings. 

And sometimes we will be. There will always be that person that tries to make someone else feel like less of a person for not having it all (and if you want me to go back to lessons learned as a child, these people may very likely be insecure themselves and trying to make themselves feel better by hurting others). But who really cares if we don't have everything? The answer is: not us and not anyone who truly cares about us! 

So how do we become happy with less?

1.  Stop comparing yourself to everyone else.
   
   We all have different resources and priorities in life. And that is fine, even how it should be. Once you have decided what your priorities are and what you can and can't live without, stop looking around at the belongings other people have and the choices they make. In fact, don't even look at what they have when you are decided. Make your decisions based on what works for you and your family. I have made the decision to live with less stuff, but sometimes I catch myself thinking that I need more stuff because someone else around me has it. If I were to let this thought consume me it would end one of two ways: 1) I am going to be bitter that I don't have a house full of stuff; or 2) I am going to have a house full of stuff and an empty bank account and full garbage can (because stuff generally produces waste).
   
   
   
2. Look at what you do have.
   
   For those who are religious, think of this as "counting your blessings." Though it may not seem that we have a lot, if you take the time, I bet you could come up with a huge list of things in your life that you do have. Make sure to include non-monetary items, such as health and a supportive family, as well as monetary items, such as shelter and transportation.
   
   
   
3. Change your wording.
   
   Instead of thinking "this house isn't big enough," think "I am so happy I have a roof over my head." This kind of thinking will help you to appreciate what you came up with in #2.
   
   
   
4. Decide what you do need and forget about the rest.
   
   There is a big difference between needs and wants. Learn to differentiate.  Nobody in my household needs 20 different outfits. I also don't need 8 spatulas or a small appliance for every task in the kitchen. I used to always be rearranging closets and cabinets trying to find a better organizational method for all my stuff when it occurred to me that I didn't need more space, I needed less stuff. So now I am always looking for what I can get rid of and do without. While the throwing things out doesn't necessarily save me money, it does make me appreciate simplicity, which saves me from spending money later on when I do not need anything.
   
   
   
5. Get creative. 
   
   This goes along with #4. When a need does arise, take a look around at what you have to see if you can use something else in its place instead of immediately running to the store. You may want new baskets for storage in your home, but do you have boxes already that will work just as well? The same goes for activities and entertainment. You do not have to go to the movies every week or take your kids to an amusement park every weekend. Instead make your own fun, seeing just how much you can have without spending a dime.

What about you? Have you made peace with less? If so, what did you do?

Grocery Nerd

A fellow blogger posted on Diaper Swappers a few days ago talking about how she was addicted to reading thrifty grocery shopping blogs and how that must make her a grocery nerd. Well let me tell you, I am definitely a grocery nerd! I get so happy when my favorite blogs update with recent grocery store purchases. Maybe it is the nosiness in me, but I really like to see what other people are buying and what they pay for it. Sometimes these bloggers have opposite eating habits from me, but it doesn't matter. I still love to read their posts!

Okay, here is my next nerdy confession: I love making my grocery list. I really do. It is key to keeping my grocery bill low and although I do it every two weeks and my next shopping trip is at least a week ahead, I am already itching to start working on it (and will actually do it when I get done writing this)! I guess the main reason I love this is because it is like a challenge I have with myself to see how low I can get it with still getting the foods I need.

And...I love grocery shopping! I know a lot of people absolutely dread this task, but it is one of my favorites. Although it is fun when you are able to grab whatever looks good, it is also fun for me to have to shop from my list. I really like being able to cross things off of said list :)


Okay, that is it. It feels good to get that off my chest. Go ahead, judge me if you want. But I bet there are some grocery nerds lurking out there right now!

Guilt

I haven't posted in over two months (though it seems like much longer) and I will admit that a lot of that has to do with guilt. Guilt because I have been using my dryer exclusively. Guilt because I haven't been turning off the water when I brush my teeth every time or always unplugging my small appliances. I also have been really, really bad about sticking to my grocery budget the last few months. I blame a large part of that on the little naked person swimming inside my belly (don't you like the way I put that?).

Yes, the Green & Thrifty household is going to grow by one (let's hope just one) in June. Because of this I was sick and super tired for a couple months and just did not feel like doing anything to be thrifty. So we ate out a lot, got take-out, and ate a lot of processed foods (thus another source of guilt). I also didn't feel like hanging my clothes to dry. We were lucky to get any clean clothes around here. I have just started to get back in the swing of things these last few weeks (and then there was Christmas...), even though I still get tired.

So you see, I couldn't possibly write posts telling you how to eat whole foods on a budget while eating my frozen pizza and Taco Bell. Plus I was just too tired to write them anyway :)

Guilt is something I struggle with a lot. I do not feel guilty because I think I am a bad person but because my actions are not good enough. Any mom (or parent for that matter) probably knows exactly what I am talking about (does the term "Mommy Wars" ring a bell?). You try your hardest to do what you think is the right thing, only to be told that it is not enough. I may feed the Kid fruits and vegetables, but he doesn't always eat enough of those or a wide variety. Sometimes (okay, a lot of the time) he gets crackers. Sometimes I make macaroni-and-cheese from a BOX (though it is organic...).

Sometimes I feel that no matter how hard I try to feed my family healthily, it just isn't good enough. There is always something MORE I SHOULD be doing. Then I figure that if I'm never going to be good enough, I might as well give up and start stocking my shelves with Hamburger Helper and Little Debbies.

I also read a lot of blogs on saving money by other moms and I think that I'm spending my money on the wrong things or I am not saving enough or I am just spending too much all together. Then I go back to the above mentality and I want to throw this whole budgeting thing out the window and fill my grocery cart with whatever I feel like or buy that new pair of shoes.

But it is at these times where I have to (figuratively) slap myself and say that every step in the right direction is a good one. Yeah, I could spend less. I could eat healthier. There is ALWAYS something better we can be doing, something MORE we can be doing for ourselves, our families, and the planet. But we can't do everything. Not everyone can be a Superman or Superwoman. I am doing what I can at the moment while continually learning about ways to improve - and that is all we can ask of ourselves.

photos courtesy of Getty Images